Mom Guilt is a real thing, am I right? But for anyone, not feeling like enough is SO common. We live in a time when families are portrayed as perfect on social media, and what we have to offer can’t possibly be good enough.
Lately, I’ve been feeling this more. It’s January. So it’s a bit gray and rainy here in Washington. I’m tired. I’m worn out. And I’m just not feeling good enough. Like my best is barely getting anyone by.
This is not okay!
And then … I was reminded of the story of The Little Drummer Boy. This boy, thinking he’s following the wise men to a parade of some sort, grabs his drum, and tags along. Only, when he gets to where they’re going, he realizes he’s not there for a parade at all. He watches the men presents gifts to this baby in a manger, and thinks to himself how he has nothing to offer this baby boy.
When the baby’s mother noticed the little drummer boy about to walk away, she asked him why he was leaving, and he explained he had no gifts for the baby. She motioned to his drum, and asked him to play for the baby.
How often are we the little drummer boy? We think we have nothing to offer our families, our friends, our coworkers … we feel guilty over our lack for them–and for God.
But our presence is the true gift–our time. We don’t have to arrive with amazing gifts, an abundance spilling out, but rather, we just have to show up.
In Luke 21, the story tells of the poor widow giving the only two coins she likely had to her name. And Jesus saying that, out of their abundance, the rich give, but this widow, in fact, gave more. And how true is that of us as people? When things are going great for us, it’s so much simpler to give of our time and resources and energy, right? But when we’re feeling down and out, and like we don’t have enough, how could we possibly have anything to offer anyone?
Now, I do agree that it is hard to pour from an empty cup. But I think that means different things for different people. I realize if you’re barely paying rent, or keeping your utilities on, that it’s going to be much harder to give of your financial resources. But I also wholeheartedly believe in bringing that to God, and realizing that what you do have to offer is more than enough … and God will fill in the gaps.
I know I need this reminder often, and so I sincerely hope you realize that you’ve done enough, and more importantly, you are enough–for your spouses, kids, friends, parents, siblings, and co-workers. Life can feel so heavy, but it’s not supposed to. So I pray you know your presence, your love, your time is the true gift to those who you love and who love you back. And when you feel weak, seek God. It’s in those moments of complete emptiness that we can reach out to the one who can TRULY re-fill us.